A funeral or memorial is a customary way to recognize death and its finality. Funerals are held for the living to show respect for the dead and to help survivors begin the grief process. They also give mourners a chance to share stories, create memories, fulfill religious beliefs & customs, participate in a support system, and gather at a peaceful place during a time of confusion and uncertainty.

There can be as many as 200 tasks when planning a funeral. Many of them are listed below. Our Funeral Director will coordinate most of these for you, after meeting with you at a private consultation.

• Obtain the signature of the attending physician, coroner or medical examiner on the required certificate; file the certificate with the registrar of vital statistics where the death occurred

• Ensure compliance with government regulators

• Transfer the deceased from the place of death to the funeral home (local or out of town)

• Obtain family history

• Make decisions regarding the remains of the deceased

• Determine the budget (if funeral has not been pre-arranged)

• Determine the funeral or memorial service location(s), such as church, chapel, or graveside

• Plan for a viewing/visitation and determine open or closed casket

• Choose the final resting place (cemetery, mausoleum, private land, etc.)

• Make necessary arrangements with clergy, church and cemetery officials

• Obtain certified copies of the death certificate, as necessary

• Procure the burial permit and file with the cemetery

• Select and purchase the casket, outer burial container or urn

• Select a monument/marker

• Order and schedule the delivery of all products/merchandise

• Compose and submit newspaper and other media notices

• Choose clothing & jewelry

• Select poems, scripture, readings

• Select music: taped, live musicians, etc.

• Choose pallbearers

• Arrange for transportation of the deceased

• Secure flower/equipment trucks, as necessary

• Purchase acknowledgement cards, register books, memorial folders, etc.

• Purchase a door wreath & flowers

• Arrange for family transportation

• Complete social security papers and secure social security benefits

• Secure Veterans benefits (if applicable)

• Secure life insurance benefits (if applicable)

• Contact insurance agents

• Complete accounting, clerical and filing work

• Answer telephone calls

• Notify other organizations that your loved one participated in

• Deliver flowers to local nursing homes, hospitals etc. following the funeral

Other than the family, there are veteran, union, and other organizational benefits to pay for funerals, including, in certain instances, a lump sum death payment from Social Security. In most states, some form of public aid allowances are available from either the state, county, city, or a combination. Most funeral directors are aware of the various benefits and know how to obtain them.

In order for a family member to receive benefits, the deceased worker must have credit for work covered by Social Security, ranging from 1 ½ to 10 years depending on his or her age at death.

The following family members may receive benefits:

• A widow or widower age 60 or older (50 if disabled), or at any age if caring for an entitled child who is under 16 or disabled.
• A divorced widow or widower age 60 or older (50 if disabled) if the marriage lasted 10 years, or if caring for an entitled child who is under 16 or disabled.
• Unmarried children up to 18 (19 if they are attending a primary or secondary school full lime).
• Children who were disabled before reaching 22, as long as they remained disabled.
• Dependent parent or parents 62 or older.

Reimbursement of Burial Expenses

VA will pay a burial allowance up to $2,000 if the veteran’s death is service connected. VA also will pay the cost of transporting the remains of a service-disabled veteran to the national cemetery nearest the home of a deceased that has available gravesites. In such cases, the person who bore the veteran’s burial expenses may claim reimbursement from VA. VA will pay a $300 burial and funeral expense allowance for veterans who, at time of death, were entitled to receive pension or compensation or would have been entitled to compensation but for receipt of military retirement pay. Eligibility also is established when death occurs in a VA facility or a nursing home with which VA contracted. Additional costs of transportation of the remains may be reimbursed. There is no time limit for filing reimbursement claims of service-connected deaths. In other deaths, claims must be filed within two years after permanent burial or cremation.

VA will pay a $300 plot allowance when the veteran is not buried in a cemetery that is under U.S. Government jurisdiction if the veteran is discharged from active duty because of disability incurred or aggravated in line of duty, if the veteran was in receipt of compensation or pension or would have been in receipt of compensation but for receipt of military retired pay, or if the veteran died while hospitalized by VA. The plot allowance is not payable solely on wartime service.

If the veteran is buried without charge for the cost of a plot or interment in a state-owned cemetery reserved solely for veteran burials, the $300 plot allowance may be paid to the state. Burial expenses paid by the deceased’s employer or a state agency will not be reimbursed.

Veterans and armed forces members who die on active duty are eligible for burial in one of VA’s 114 national cemeteries. An eligible veteran must have been discharged or separated from active duty under honorable or general conditions and have completed the required period of service. Persons entitled to retired pay as a result of 20 years creditable service with a reserve component are eligible. A U.S. citizen who served in the armed forces of a government allied with the United States in a war also may be eligible.

Spouses and minor children of eligible veterans and of armed forces members also may be buried in a national cemetery. A surviving spouse of an eligible veteran who married a nonveteran, and whose remarriage was terminated by death or divorce, is eligible for burial in a national cemetery.

Gravesites in national cemeteries cannot be reserved. Funeral directors or others making burial arrangements must apply at the time of death. Reservations made under previous programs are honored. The National Cemetery System normally does not conduct burials on weekends. A weekend caller, however, will be directed to one of three strategically located VA cemetery offices that remain open during weekends to schedule burials at the cemetery of the caller’s choice during the following week.

Flat bronze, flat granite, flat marble, upright granite and upright marble types are available to mark the grave in a style consistent with the place of burial. Niche markers also are available to mark columbaria used for inurnment of cremated remains.

Headstones and markers are inscribed with the name of the deceased, the years of birth and death, and branch of service. Optional items that also may be inscribed at VA expense are: military grade, rank or rate; war service such as World War II; months and days of birth and death; an emblem reflecting one’s beliefs; valor awards; and the Purple Heart. Additional items may be inscribed at private expense.

When burial is in a national, state veteran or military cemetery, the headstone marker is ordered through the cemetery, inscription, shipping and placement can be obtained from the cemetery.

When burial occurs in a cemetery other than a national, military post or state veterans cemetery, the headstone marker must be applied for from VA. It is shipped at government expense. VA, however, does not pay the cost of placing the headstone or marker on the grave. To apply, you must complete VA form 40-1330 and forward it to Director, Office of Memorial Programs (403A), National Cemetery System, Department of Veterans Affairs, Washington, DC 20420. Forms and assistance are available at VA application you may call the Director, Office of Memorial Programs at 1-800-697-6947.

VA cannot issue a headstone or marker for a spouse or child buried in a private cemetery. Twenty-year reservists without active duty service are eligible for a headstone or marker, if they are entitled to military retired pay at the time of death.